One thing I’ve realized since growing up is my view on summer. Let me start with what summer used to be:
Summer was one thing I always looked forward to. Once I returned to school in September, I started a mental countdown towards summer in my head. What would I be doing once it gets here? Basically what I’ve always done since the first summer vacation I can remember: do nothing.
There’s something amazing about being gluttonous, filling up on food, and mindlessly spending all your time watching TV or gaming the days away. It just felt right to not do anything.
Here’s my problem: I’m no longer happy with doing nothing.
My dilemma since January when I returned to school after working for two school terms was wondering what I would do this summer. I applied for a few jobs I was interested in, but I didn’t land a position. Then there was the idea of starting my own project, or developing an idea for the summer. But that seems so un-concrete and not satisfying because I did not know where that will lead. I guess it’d also help if I had an amazing idea I could pursue, but right now, I don’t.
Then I thought about traveling. Broadening my horizons, and getting inspired through learning new cultures. Quickly another roadblock came before me: I didn’t have money for travelling.
I liked last summer when I knew I was working on multiple projects at TrojanOne. I liked the summer before, when I spent it interning in Hong Kong, allowing me to travel and work. What in the world am I going to do with the four month break ahead of me?
It’s weird how something that I used to see as paradise now looks haunting and ominous to me. I want more experience, and I want to do something productive with my time. I want to throw my heart and soul into something for the next four months. I WANT TO DO SOMETHING!
I guess we’ll see where I end up?